today became a case of the "I don't give a shit" s

Why do people suck?
just a question to the masses.

I just want to shout
"Seriously?!? Get your own fucking life"
at the top of my lungs
while riding a bike down Main St
and smoking a cigarette.


Oh boy.
I guess its been one of those weeks-months rather.
I used to believe that being honest was where it's at, you know?
That life was about paying it forward
and that people,
deep deep deep deep and sometimes VERY deepdeepdeep down
give a shit.

Oh how hard the innocent fall.
(and how the evil will soon rise- jk jk)
But seriously,
in these past few weeks,
I've had the pleasure
if you wanna call it that
of coming in contact with people

who don't listen when you say you are burned out and need a break

who try to regulate and rule a life that isn't theirs just for the purpose of making themselves happy

who stick their nose where it doesn't belong and can't be mature enough to calmly have a conversation.

I am so sick and tired of people.
the
"I don't care" s and the "I don't give a shit" s
are driving me bonkers.

So I've decided a solution to all of you shitty people,

take your mother effing pity party elsewhere because, why?
I don't give a shit.

go find someone else to bitch out because, why?
I don't give a shit.

Today was spontaneous.

Have you ever just felt like giving up on school?
I mean, to those of you out there,
those of you who are getting married, pregnant or just unmotivated
do you ever want to let it go?

I just got a great job
(now now, no laughing!)
at Olive Garden.
I know its not a career by any means
but hey,
its a job and I make some pretty decent money.

I blogged last time about the show Army Wives
(which everyone should watch ps)
and two of the characters gave up school to become an Army wife.
Which, if what happens on the show is in any way remotely true,
is a full time job in itself.

I've always wanted to be a nurse,
but sometimes I just want to be a wife and a mother.

I think I was born in the 1800's.



Anyway, today was spontaneous.
I had a blast.
I went out with my fiance and a friend and just hung out.
We got Red Lobster for lunch
to short pump
to Marshall's
and to Burlington Coat Factory
(which is a little ghetttttoo- no offense)
but cool all the same.


And we are just gonna hang out and watch Shawshank Redemption
while chowing down on some good 'ol southern style BBQ.

Sweet dreams!

Ps. check out http://twitter.com/charliemcdowell
hilarious!

Today was a fairytale

"Holey Moley, Me Oh My
You're the Apple of my Eye!"

SIDE NOTE:

I know this is such a change from my previous post,
I was so angry and frustrated before.
I've matured,
I've grown.
I understand.
I love you, and I will stand beside you forever.

Goodness Gracious, I'm so in love!!!!
I mean, I've always been in love but epiphanies are something special let me tell you.
My fiance is joining the Military
and we had an agreement that when he left he would buy me all the seasons of
Army Wives
so I would have something to do.
Well, he bought them earlier.
Can I just say,
the show is ah-mazing!

Seriously though,
My fiance is the best man I've ever met.
He wants to join the military to fight for the country that has given him so much.
He has duty.
He has honor.
He is a man.

I only wish that others could be just like you, baby.
You shine so bright it's insane
and I can't imagine my life without you.

You're gonna be my soldier
and
I'm gonna be your army wife.


I love you.

You make my today's a fairytale.

today is a good day

This past Monday kind of stunk.
Is there any one out there that has rough "times of the month"? I mean, seriously, what is up with the cramps and the depression?
Come on life!
I finally feel better today though, thank goodness.
I have decided to eat healthier (as I eat my last bit of bad food- Pringles) and I am going to start to go to the gym.
Summer is coming...that means bathing suit season, uuuggghhh.
Why is there so much pressure on looking good? Who decides these things?
Is there anyone else out there who thinks those stupid magazines that set the standards for what looks "attractive"?

Military. Military. Military.
Why is this all my life has turned into?
What happened to being normal?
I fell in love with a Military man.
Why, oh why?
As crazy as it is, I have done a lot of research on being an army wife
http://armywives.com/
And all of these women, God bless their strength, seem to not be worried about their significant others being deployed.
How can you not be?
My fiance isn't even in yet and I have nightmares now!
However, I can say that I can live without the snoring (just kidding!).
How do you survive? How on earth do you battle the loneliness and uncertainties?
If there is anyone out there that can tell me please do,
cjh2262@email.vccs.edu .
There is so much that I struggle with, like why can't he choose a safer profession?
Sometimes I feel like he cares about me, but I am second best.
I wanted to do Peace Corp nursing.
I gave it up.
Because I wanted to be with him.
Is it silly of me to want the same respect?
I guess I can't though, if you love someone you can't ask them to give up their dreams.
He never asked, I did it myself.
But still.


Oh I don't know anything anymore.
"The more I see the less I know."

God Bless all of the troops,
I hope that you can come home to those that love you.

Today is the first in awhile

Today is just another day.
I keep trying to remind myself of that but
today is another day closer.
I don't know if i can keep my mind from thinking about that.

Another day closer to him leaving for war.
Another day closer to being left behind.
Another day closer to uncertainty.

But its a normal day all the same right?
And normal days are beautiful.



We went to Ft. Lee last weekend. It was...different.
I don't know how cut out for this military lifestyle I really am.
It feels so separate and reclusive. I read online somewhere that Army wives are better off with other Army wives because no one else understands. Is that what I am going to become? Stuck on base 24/7?

Meh.
Atleast I'll have my dogs!
Grace Kelly and Ginger Rogers.
Dogs are seriously the greatest thing in the world.
I can't imagine my life without mine.

PS.

Pajama jeans?

ohmydeargod.

www.PajamaJeans.com

today is a day of firsts!

My first blog. I'm almost weirded out by it, this whole concept of writing about myself. It's almost self obsessed, thinking that others would want to read what you have to say.

I can't do journals so I'm going to try my hand at this.

At this current moment, it is very cold here; lots and lots of snow and ice which my dogs love to eat and play in. I guess that would be ok, and very very cute, if they would go to the bathroom first and then play later- but they don't.

Life is ordinary.
At least today.

Normal day, let me be aware of the treasure you are.